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PRINCE: | You’re the kind old lady who makes gingerbread for the children, aren’t you? |
WITCH: | Why, yes, that’s right, my dear. (Aside, to audience:) Well, “for the children” – “from the children” – there’s not much difference! |
PRINCE: | I was wondering if you’d seen a small boy and girl pass this way recently? |
WITCH: | Sorry, no. |
(There is a knocking noise from within the cupboard.) | |
PRINCE: | What was that? |
(The WITCH moves to the door, still facing the Prince and kicks the cupboard door angrily several times with the back of her heel.) | |
WITCH: | Oh, nothing – it’s just the mice! |
PRINCE: | Oh, I see. Well, if you haven’t seen anyone, I’ll leave you to your good deeds. (Then, as an after-thought:) Oh, by the way – as you give all your gingerbread to youngsters, you’ll need to be CRB checked now, I’m afraid. |
WITCH: | All these rules and regulations! |
PRINCE: | I know, but in your case, it’s just a formality, you understand. You may have already received the form? |
WITCH: | This one? (She takes out a folded piece of paper.) I was going to post it … |
PRINCE: | Here, let me save you the trouble. (He takes it, unfolds it and is taken aback.) Hey, wait a minutes – what’s this? It says, “When do you like children best?” And you’ve put: “When I’m eating one”! |
WITCH: | No, that says, “When I’m meeting one”! |
PRINCE: | Oh, my mistake! But the next question is, “What do you enjoy most about them?” And you’ve answered: “Their tender young livers”! |
WITCH: | Lives! Their tender young lives! |
PRINCE: | (Continuing to read) “Not to mention their sweet hearts”? |
WITCH: | Not to mention they are sweethearts! (She rolls her eyes impatiently.) |
PRINCE: | But it goes on: “What is your favourite food?” And you say: “Steak and kiddie pie”! |
WITCH: | No, “Steak and kidney pie”! You should have gone to Specsavers, my dear! |
PRINCE: | But look! “What is your favourite sound?” And you’ve put: “A child slaughter”! |
WITCH: | Your eyes really are bad! That says: “A child’s laughter”! |
PRINCE: | Oh, so it does! How silly of me! |
HANSEL & GRETEL: |
Although both are about 10-14, they are often played by older teenagers. (Male and female) |
FRITZ: | Hansel and Gretel’s father, a woodcutter. (Male) |
HILDEGARD: | Hansel and Gretel’s mean step-mother. (Female) |
PEGGY PUMPERNICKEL: |
Pantomime Dame, a jovial gypsy. (Obviously, best played by a man) |
WALLY: | Peggy’s silly son. (Male or can be played by female) |
HEATHER: | Peggy’s bright daughter. (Principal girl) |
PRINCE JOHANN: | Typical Prince character. (Can either be played by male, or female as Principal Boy) |
WOLFGANG: | The Prince’s Equerry. (Male, or could be re-named female, possibly a youngster) |
BASIL: | The dim-witted forester and game-keeper. (Male but could be played by female) |
NUT-MEG: | A daft forager who teams up with Basil to form a typical panto-style comedy twosome. (Female) |
BLUEBELL: | The Fairy of the Forest. (Female) |
NIGHTSHADE: | The Wicked Witch of the Woods. (Female) |
KLAUS: | A circus ringmaster. (Male, or re-named female) |
OTTO: | A snowy owl (Male or female – smaller part) |
RUSSELL & SHERYL: |
Two nasty crows who assist Nightshade. (Male and female – smaller parts) |
CHORUS & DANCERS: |
Villagers Lumberjacks Forest Animals / Birds Circus Performers / Clowns Gypsies Nightshade’s Minions Gingerbread Men / Sweets |
ACT I | |
Prologue: | Forest Fairy Feud (Front cloth or front of Tabs) |
Scene 1 : | The Village of Munchen Luncheon (Full stage village scene) |
Scene 2 : | Jolly Gypsy Japes (Front cloth or front of Tabs) |
Scene 3 : | Into the Woods … (Full stage forest scene) |
Scene 4 : | Back in the Village (As Act I Scene 2) |
Scene 5 : | Recipe for Disaster (Half-stage scene with MS Tabs or cloth) |
Scene 6 : | A Turn Up for the Books (As Act I Scene 2) |
Scene 7 : | Join the Circus (Full stage circus scene – inside the big top) |
ACT II | |
Scene 1 : | Peggy Pumpernickel’s Party (Full stage gypsy encampment scene, or as Act I Scene 1) |
Scene 2 : | The Powers of Persuasion (As Act I Scene 2) |
Scene 3 : | The Petrified Forest (Full stage haunted forest scene, or adapted from Act I Scene 3) |
Scene 4 : | Meanwhile in Munchen (As Act I Scene 2) |
Scene 5 : | The Sugar Candy Cottage (Full stage, as Act II Scene 3, plus cottage flats or truck) |
Scene 6 : | A Plan is Hatched (As Act I Scene 2) |
Scene 7 : | Deadly Nightshade? (Full stage scene – inside the Sugar Candy Cottage, with oven) |
Scene 8 : | Fun before we Finish! (Front of Tabs) |
Scene 9 : | Farewell from the Forest (Full stage Finale, as Act I Scene 1) |